020: Common Cold Plushie

What is it? A plushie depicting the common cold.

Pros: Blue is good colour for cold. Personifies a microbe as simply doing its job and not being especially vicious or spiteful. Furriness is nice. Cute eyes make owner almost want a cold. Five-prong layout is unconventional. Proof that Delaware has production facilities.

Cons: The common cold ought not to be trivialised. Not big enough to be cuddled. Cute eyes sometimes look sinister. When owner has cold, also has urge to burn item.

Worthiness of pointing motion: 6/10. Colourful for kids. Mixed reactions for adults. Sad for original owner.

019: Meccano Buggy

What is it? A buggy made from Meccano.

Pros: British engineering at finest. Proof that Meccano can be made easily enough. British racing green to reflect domestic production and driving prowess. Long-lasting vulcanised rubber wheels make for long-distance travel. Structurally sound. Carbon-neutral driving.

Cons: Missing a fourth washer for back strut; left out of packaging. Wheels don't turn. No pedals. Too big for Lego driver, too small for Playmobil/Lego Technic driver. No engine. Woefully out-of-proportion steering wheel.

Worthiness of pointing motion: 8/10. Reminding kids that older toys can still be kinda cool. Kinda.

017: Ikea Sparka Plus Football

What is it? Ikea's plush football, codename 'Sparka'.

Pros: Soft treat for kids. Blue and white are classic colour combination. Made in Indonesia, therefore stimulating the growing economy of an island nation. Pentagon/hexagon pattern maintains footballing credentials. Can be thrown really hard at person's face without too much retribution.

Cons: Cannot be used for regulation game of football. Tag is obscenely long and does not aid rolling motion needed for ball's purpose. 'Sparka' could denote 'fire' to young children; not good as it is intensely flammable. Draws light in photographs, making well-lit rooms look like caverns.

Worthiness of pointing motion: 9/10. "Dear Ikea. Can you please invest in stickers for goods? Your tags are f***ing ridiculous. Sincerely, the world."